Turn Anger to Forgiveness
Forgiveness is a huge topic that can often open up many old wounds, stifling our ability to live fully and freely in the now.
Angry thoughts of injustice, vengeance and retaliation can run riot in your mind, creating more stress and discomfort in your body.
Forgiveness is generally defined as a conscious, deliberate decision to release feelings of resentment or vengeance toward a person or group who has harmed you.
This conscious act is done regardless of whether the person or group actually deserves your forgiveness.
Just as important as defining what forgiveness is, though, is understanding what forgiveness is not.
Experts who study or teach forgiveness make clear that when you forgive, you do not gloss over or deny the seriousness of an offense against you.
Forgiveness does not mean forgetting, nor does it mean condoning or excusing offenses.
Though forgiveness can help repair a damaged relationship, it doesn’t obligate you to reconcile with the person who harmed you, or release them from legal accountability.
Instead, forgiveness brings the forgiver peace of mind, and frees him or her from corrosive anger.
In that way, it empowers you to recognise the pain you suffered without letting that pain define you, enabling you to heal and move on with your life.
[Tweet “Anger breeds anxiety and depression. It sucks the joy and purpose out of being alive….”]Anger breeds anxiety and depression. It sucks the joy and purpose out of being alive, and leaves us feeling isolated and alone in our self-perpetuating misery.
Is it really worth hold onto to?
Letting go of grudges and bitterness can make way for happiness, health and peace.
Over the past few decades’ research on forgiveness has revealed enormous personal benefits.
Forgiveness can lead to:
- Healthier relationships
- Greater spiritual and psychological well-being
- Less anxiety, stress and hostility
- Lower blood pressure
- Fewer symptoms of depression
- Stronger immune system
- Improved heart health
- Higher self-esteem
The practice of forgiveness has been shown to reduce anger, hurt, depression and stress, and leads to greater feelings of hope, peace, compassion and self confidence.
It also influences our attitude which opens the heart to kindness, compassion and love.
When you claim responsibility for your own feelings, you are no longer reliant upon outside sources to validate, placate or instigate any reaction or response of feeling that you may have.
When a person has an experience of forgiveness after claiming responsibility for all of their feelings, it’s like an organic form of forgiveness.
So when you finally get in touch with the fact that, “I recognise I am feeling hurt, but I understand that this feeling is inside of me, and no one is doing it to me”, that breeds organic forgiveness.
[Tweet ““I recognise I am feeling hurt, but I understand that this feeling is inside of me, and no one is doing it to me””]This kind of inner awareness and acceptance gives you a pathway to your own source of power:
- You are able to decide for yourself.
- You are no longer held captive by your own justification or indignation.
- You are free to choose, free to feel, and free to change.
Blame then has no opportunity to direct your thoughts outside of yourself and hold others’ responsible for how you feel.
With the new year now under way, it’s the perfect time to start practising forgiveness and letting go of accumulated anger.
A couple of effective methods for releasing anger are:
- Ho’Oponopono – a traditional Hawaiian energy clearing technique to release blocked negative energy flow.
- EFT or Emotional Freedom Technique – tapping on meridian energy points to diffuse chemical wiring responses.
- Guided Visualisation Meditation – using the power of the mind to release and cleanse blocked emotions.
Love Viki xo
About Viki
Viki Thondley is a Mind-Body Wellness Specialist and qualified Holistic Counsellor, Food, Stress & Lifestyle Coach, Meditation Therapist, and Eating Disorder Recovery Coach who inspires women to shift from limited thinking, low self-esteem and restriction to whole-self nourishment, body confidence and whole food healing. Recovered from bulimia nervosa and the many years of hormonal imbalances, food prison and self-sabotaging behaviours’, Viki is an inspiring coach, speaker and event host who also provides personalised holistic programs, workshops and live events to instil self-love, happiness, body confidence and real food freedom. She is author of “Achieving Your Wellness: Create a Life You Love” and “Healthy Chocolate Delights: Real Food Sweet Treats”.
